Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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