fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
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