look no pants
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
