I think I am morally bankrupt
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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