Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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