we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.