Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk

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  (352): I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk http://tfl.nu/lbo9
  Replies (7) Good night (3034) Bad night (680)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm

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  (978): jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm http://tfl.nu/w84r
  Replies (13) Good night (952) Bad night (5359)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?

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  (814): Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects? http://tfl.nu/389h
  Replies (35) Good night (2354) Bad night (863)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.

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  (804): Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster. http://tfl.nu/ns19
  Replies (10) Good night (3649) Bad night (1096)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I love you bro

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  (630): Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese (312): Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard? (630): I love you bro http://tfl.nu/jz3g
  Replies (10) Good night (3440) Bad night (709)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.

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  (313): its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom. http://tfl.nu/3nbn
  Replies (10) Good night (916) Bad night (1264)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?

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  (610): On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate? http://tfl.nu/oozq
  Replies (8) Good night (1501) Bad night (515)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.

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  (254): I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake. http://tfl.nu/f2e6
  Replies (8) Good night (552) Bad night (1305)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".

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  (443): I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over". http://tfl.nu/6ral
  Replies (0) Good night (543) Bad night (752)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee

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  (717): dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee http://tfl.nu/bnsi
  Replies (10) Good night (454) Bad night (930)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.

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  (903): I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot. http://tfl.nu/592z
  Replies (7) Good night (657) Bad night (264)
• Favorite

  (226): View more from Ontario

  You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"

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  (226): You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!" http://tfl.nu/6320
  Replies (1) Good night (685) Bad night (283)
• Favorite

  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.

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  (580): Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style. http://tfl.nu/uibp
  Replies (3) Good night (225) Bad night (530)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.

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  (502): I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did. http://tfl.nu/zibd
  Replies (4) Good night (520) Bad night (229)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not

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  (920): I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not http://tfl.nu/p3ul
  Replies (2) Good night (762) Bad night (226)

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