why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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