what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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