i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
