They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
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Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
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Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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