Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
