the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
