I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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