Already got asked if we're dating
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
