when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Randomize
