yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
