So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
