i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I want her autograph on my taint
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
