? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
