So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
