if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I believe in your delicious
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Randomize