I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize