All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
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he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
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