dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
i know! what is this dateline?
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!