If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
23 People Have Step Parents That Are Younger Than Them
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats