she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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