you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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