I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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