Will you blow on my dice?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Damn victory sex feels great
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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