Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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