Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Randomize
