Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Damn victory sex feels great
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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