He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
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The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
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The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
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