I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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