just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
