dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Randomize
