we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Randomize
