im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
my being single is dangerous.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
