Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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