I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Michael Bay diarrhea
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Randomize
