True but thats because hes a fetus.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
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