In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
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