Do you still have your period?
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
