Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
