no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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