PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
it's not cheating when I paid for it
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize