I can't watch pbs sober anymore
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
