I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
