haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Randomize