she looked like the before picture.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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