Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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